Coaching Boys into Men

The boys that you see in your practice may need help and support to grow into healthy young men. Boys are bombarded with influences from friends, the neighborhood, TV, the Internet, music and movies. They see and hear various things about what it means to "be a man," often that they have to be tough and in control. These messages can be harmful. Additionally, boys may need advice on how to behave towards girls.

By encouraging parents/guardians to teach the young men in their care that there is no place for violence in a relationship, you can help parents and boys reduce the chance of future occurrences of violence. Inform parents/guardians that they should:

Teach early
It is never too soon to talk to a child about violence. Talk with him about what it means to be fair, to share and to treat others with respect.

Listen
Hear what he has to say. Ask him if he has ever seen abusive behavior by his friends or at home. Is he worried that any of his friends are hurting someone else?

Tell him how
Talk to him about ways to express anger without violence; that when he gets mad, he can walk it out or talk it out. Try to give him examples of what you might say or do in situations that could turn violent.

Bring it up
Boys may not ask for help on how to treat girls/women but they need it. Let him know that you do not approve of sports figures that demean women, or of jokes, video games and song lyrics that do the same. Be sure he knows treating girls with respect is important.